Las Vegas, NV: There's so much to describe when you're in Vegas. The over-the-top-ness of the loud sounds and flashing lights around you; the witnessing of people borderline losing their minds in a short amount of time and chalking it up to "when in Vegas..."'; the insane amounts of EVERYTHING -- alcohol, money, sex, food, smoking, noise, air conditioning... it's enough to make you forget who you truly are and start to actually believe you are invincible.
I found this questionnaire from another
blog and decided to answer it in Vegas, to remind me of the REAL me. How I am right now, at this very moment, sitting in my penthouse suite in the extra fluffy white robe, surrounded by all my big winnings from last night's blackjack game, while my pool boy pours me another cup of coffee...
(ok, there can be SOME embellishing in Vegas...)
i am: precious (and I can finally tell someone... and believe it myself).
i think: a lot. About what I did. About what I'm doing. About what I might do someday.
i know: I'm not perfect. But I'm still trying to be a better person. Everyday.
i want: to have deep conversation, good wine and infectious laughter.
i have: great glasses. And a great smile. :)
i wish: I was a little bit taller. (skee-lo shout out!)
i hate: racism and homophobia. (Seriously? You can HATE someone because they are not white or straight?!)
i miss: my blankey.
i fear: the unknown. But I get bored with consistency.
i feel: like I'm progressing. mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
i hear: Matt Wertz singing "Everything's Right" on my iPod.
i smell: like "Happy" by Clinique (even though it's "Wanna Play?" from Target).
i crave: a deeper relationship with God and the journey to figure out what that actually means.
i search: constantly for the "what's next?"
i wonder: if I'll ever be truly content or if I will always be searching!
i regret: hurting others, even when I didn't realize I was doing it. But especially when I did realize it.
i love: hearing the beginning of "September" by Earth Wind and Fire
i ache: because I wore the same shoes all day and night... and had to walk around the Grand Garden Arena... a lot.
i care: for the band members I've worked with -- past and present.
i always: say a quick prayer when I hear an ambulance siren (thanks, mom).
i am not: my past mistakes nor my job.
i believe: is the title of a song by Busbee. One of my new, most favorite songs.
i dance: salsa on Thursday nights. Sometimes Saturdays.
i sing: harmony with the Indigo Girls on my iPod.
i don't always: know if this prayer stuff is gonna work. But I'm gonna keep trying...
i fight: myself. I am pretty good competition, too.
i write: musings from the road.
i win: because I am respected by both the host of and the top winner of the ACMA.
i lose: myself in meditation if I try hard enough... by not trying so hard.
i never: want to lose my voice in a relationship ever again.
i confuse: self-achievements with self-worth.
i listen: really, really well. I'm also a shoulder when you need a good cry.
i can usually be found: behind my computer screen.
i am scared: that my needs will be too much for someone. But I'm more scared of not putting my needs out there and ending up with the wrong person.
i need: to be known.
i am happy about: getting to go to Vegas, but being able to leave Vegas... even though, luckily, it's still the same ol' me.