Daring Greatly: Giving You The Best That I Got

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Nashville, TN (From the Daring Greatly Blog Read-Along - Pages 184 – 213 (Chapter 6) & Pages 214 – 249 (Chapter 7 & Final Thoughts))

Only two more chapters (and a Final Thoughts section) to go on Brené Brown’s book, Daring Greatly. Which, in theory, means I have two more blogs to complete for my final blog read-along. But I've decided to combine the last two chapters (and Final Thoughts section) into one final blog for a few reasons:

Chapter 6 talks about vulnerability in the office and in schools and Chapter 7 talks about wholehearted parenting. Luckily, I am neither in an office nor with children, so my guess is that I could reflect on both situations together... and hypothetically.

I'd like to wrap up this book review by the end of 2012 so I can move onto to something new in 2013.

I'm practicing imperfection by giving myself the grace to not do two blogs (like I really think I should) because, honestly, who cares? (besides my own perfectionista, that is.)

As much as I've loved really digging into this book and listening to Brené's podcasts, I'm honestly just a little tired of doing it. (that's me being vulnerable.)

Surprisingly, even though these chapters were targeted towards two very specific groups, I was able to pick out certain pieces that pertained to me, personally, and to the way I engage relationally.

WHAT I READ
In Chapter 6, Brené takes the dreamy idea of being vulnerable and open... and slaps a big fat dose of reality in your face.

She writes:
"Honest conversations about vulnerability and shame are disruptive. The simple and honest process of letting people know that discomfort is normal, it's going to happen, why it happens, and why it's important, reduces anxiety, fear, and shame. We should remember, though, that victory is not getting good feedback, avoiding giving difficult feedback, or avoiding the need for feedback. Instead it's taking off the armor, showing up, and engaging."

In the Final Thoughts portion of the book, she continues that reality check and writes:
"Vulnerability is subversive. Uncomfortable. It's even a little dangerous at times. And, without question, putting ourselves out there means there's a far greater risk of feeling hurt. But... I can honestly say that nothing is as uncomfortable, dangerous and hurtful as believing that I'm standing on the outside of my life looking in and wondering what it would be like if I had the courage to show up and let myself be seen."

I, too, can look back on my life (including throughout this blog-along) and see the times I've felt discomfort, fear and second guessing. But at the end of the day, I can honestly say I showed up. And I've got the badge to prove it!

WHAT I HEARD
In Chapter 7, Brené talks about the awesome opportunity parents have to help their children realize their potential to be courageous, compassionate and connected beings. I think we can use this advice on all kids - no matter if they are ours or not. I have two amazing Goddaughters to whom I hope I can relay this message.

Brené says:
"(God)Parents are in a unique position because we see it all. We see the bad grades, we see the date that doesn’t show up, we see the disappointment from the team that wasn’t made, we see the dirty underwear from the accident. We see it all. We’re in this incredibly honorable, sacred position to say, 'I see it all and you’re absolutely worthy of love & belonging. I don’t just see the good, polished, photoshopped-edited thing. I see it all & you’re amazing.'"

THE FINAL WRAP UP

Something said in Chapter 6 struck me in terms of Daring Greatly in relationship with others. To paraphrase a bit, she talks about the idea that maybe everyone is doing the best they can. Instead of getting frustrated with others who we feel aren't able to meet us or are potentially "sucking us dry," perhaps they're giving us the best that they've got.

And so, I will continue to dare greatly.

I will show up.

I will use my voice.

I will be vulnerable and open and compassionate.

I will believe I'm enough -- right now, as is.

I will sit in discomfort.

I will take risks and set boundaries.

I will practice gratitude.

I will live my life wholeheartedly.

I will give you the best that I've got.